As I was watching Planet Earth and scrolling through Facebook, I came across this article. While I was reading, I found to be nodding in agreement more than I would of liked to. The article was about having fun while battling with a chronic illness. In my experience, when people see me out and about they often question if I am really sick and they will openly tell me – “You don’t look sick!” or “If you are ill, you really shouldn’t be doing that!” Well people, I am sick. It took a long time and a few cameras in uncomfortable places to diagnose me. My insides don’t look too pretty! And no, I probably shouldn’t be doing what ever I’m about to but I will of saved my spoons, avoided certain foods and taken my meds to enjoy the moment – which will still be sore. Sigh.
Anyway, enough of the rant… This post while hopefully give you an insight into me venturing out the house for a night. Enjoy!
Last night, the lovely Russell offered to treat me to dinner before heading to a 30th party in Edinburgh. I love eating out (after finding a suitable restaurant – details to follow) and I love a wee dance every now and again so this was a Saturday I was not wasting stuck at home, in my jammies, watching series 7 of Gilmore Girls.
From about Wednesday, I have been on Google trying to find a place to eat. Things I needed to consider was if it was close to the party venue as walking takes it out me, if they had a wide range of choices even though I am boring and never stray away from anything with more than 3 main ingredients (chicken, cheese, tomato base – Pizza!) and hello anxiety my old friend, how busy the place would be. As I hate making final decisions, Russell had the task of picking from a list of menus I had scrutinised over. Amarone, Bella Italia or throwing a curve ball, El Cartel. (Menu reading is a favourite hobby of mine. I can recite the local Chinese menu of by heart and I am not even ashamed!)
Amarone was the winner.
So, at around 6pm we jumped on a train to Edinburgh and walked over Princes Street to Amarone. It wasn’t too busy and with a few vodka and cranberries before hand and Russell by my side I was reasonably calm – Unlike my previous meltdown at the Park Bistro a few weeks before. Cringe!
As I said in a previous post I was going to try and be adventurous so this meant no pizza for me. I was faced either with chicken in a basil sauce with mushrooms and pancetta or spaghetti and meatballs. Chicken won. The waitress did bring over an accidental pizza before hand – it was like she could sense my fear of what was to come! However, I’m glad I got the chicken as it was a solid 8/10 dish unlike Russell’s carbonara which was a bit lukewarm and tasteless. Being my dinner date though, means he always gets a meal and a half.
Now, with always sticking to the same restaurants you know things, like where the toilets are. As I had never been to Amarone before, I underestimated the trek it would be to use the loo. As I went through one door, down a set of never ending spiral stairs, along a corridor and through another two doors, I arrived at the ladies. I was at the point of doing the jiggly dance and thinking Russell better still love me if we get asked to leave because I have no bladder control and wee’d on the floor! Luckily, a cubicle was available and I darted in with my tights nearly already at my ankles. I have no shame! Disaster of wet knickers and getting renamed Miss Pee Pants was just avoided. Phew. Our night could continue along to the Voodoo Rooms.
As we had just ate, this is usually when my stomach decides to make whale noises while it’s doing it’s magic digesting. As before, I am not embarrassed by this. Before I would constantly apologise at every grumble it made, now I laugh. So I was walking into a room with my whale sounding, bloated stomach.. Great first impressions!
Russell got us both a drink and I started to relax, while eyeing up the buffet food. I love a party, and I love it even more when there is a buffet. There was pizza and chicken satays so I was rather pleased for all of 5 minutes before sitting down when the pain in my side returned which was not a welcomed addition to the party atmosphere. I am a crier, I cry easily so it took all my might to hold back the tears and snot. The pain has been measured the same pain as labour so I am pretty much having labour pains.. every… friggin… day! I held it together, thanks to Russell. I owe him big time. The pain eased, probably thanks to the few vodkas I had and I was able to carry my night on to the best nightclub in Scotland, Code (joking!)
Today, I was very tired and Russell was slightly fragile so it was the perfect excuse to lie on the couch, eat beige food (I am sure I keep Birdseye in business) and start on the Christmas movies.
I have posted pictures on Facebook which looks like I am having the time of my life. When actually I am dealing with labour pains (ha!) I would say about 60% of my night I was sore. However, I don’t want to be defined by Crohn’s so when I can, I will still continue to live my life the best way I can.
PS. Everyone who has Crohn’s suffers differently. I am fine to drink alcohol in moderation. Salad on the other hand is a no no!